Sex at 70+. What’s “normal?”

Yes, that is one of the headings of an article in my first AARP magazine.   And, I might add, the one I decide to read first.  I frantically page through the magazine looking for it and can’t find it!  It’s not in the table of contents nor is it on a page which appears to reference the article!!!  Maybe there is no sex at 70 and that’s why there’s no article! Geeze – what a tease at the outset!

I find three pages on the best ways to spend $100.  Really? If I haven’t figured out how to spend $100 by the time I am 70+ then just forget it.  Here are a few ways they suggest on how to “spend” my $100 (should I have it at 70 to spend): (1)  Play my gift cards right.  Look if I could REMEMBER to bring my gift cards to the store, there would be no issue. I don’t need help spending them; (2)  Get the autographs of stars before they become stars.  Huh?; (3) Stock up on stamps because the price is going up.  You are kidding me??!!!  By the time I’m 70 we won’t be using stamps any more and I will have WASTED my $100.

There’s one paragraph on finding my soul mate.  Why only one paragraph? Maybe at 70 it only warrants one paragraph instead of the 5 pages in O magazine. Hmm.

I find 4 pages on “It’s Never Too Late to Love Your Job.”  Pleeeease.  I am counting on my kids working when I am 70, not me.  Don’t ask me to reinvent myself at 70!  I can barely spell my name now!

Every ad seems to be for helping me survive life: The Walk In Jacuzzi, The Medical Alert, The Premier Care Peace of Mine Walk in Bath, how to plan my estate and the advantages of joining the AARP Foundation.  Where’s the organic milk, perfume and food ads?  I’m not thinking I’m going to like this too much.

At the end is an article on dating for the “older” crowd with “date tips.”  Ok, at the rate I’m going, that might be me.  Finally, something worth reading!

Have a great day!!!

Oh, and PS – if you youngsters (under 50 crowd) want to read a copy, call me … I’ll save mine for you!

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