Yesterday a friend asked me if I regretted anything in my life (well, she asked me about something in particular, but I moved away from that to wondering if I had any regrets as all). Serious and good question. I thought for a long time and then, as you might expect, I had to say “No.”
There’s no question that there have been many things in my life that didn’t work out as I expected or even as I wanted. Some of those experiences so painful that they brought me to my knees. But each of those decisions also brought me to where I am today. As painful as they were, I’ve grown as a person because of each and every one of them.
One thing I don’t want to do is wish my life away. If there’s something you really want, you should work as hard as you can to make it work. If it doesn’t work, then you were meant to go a different direction. That too is painful but also comfortable, don’t you think? As the Caribou guy and I agreed – if you don’t try, and you walk away, you will have regrets. If you try, and it didn’t work, you can move forward.
The other important point to regret, is understanding that we can’t change the past and we can’t change others. We can change our circumstances. We can change ourselves. We can change our reactions. And we can change and even burn our negative tapes. But, we have to let go of situations that are beyond our control … this has likely been my toughest life lesson – letting go.
Living with regrets is living in the past. The past was over a second a go (and likely overrated!). I want to (and try to) live by the idea that when one door closes another one opens. That’s the beauty of choice and serendipity.
Let’s not get stuck looking back at closed Door No. 1 so long that we miss out on a new door opening. It will be different from Door No. 1 — no question. But, it will be better because you will be moving forward, not looking backward!
Congrats to all the new couples!
Have a wonderful day!
theyearof50 