As I came out of the grocery store last night I saw a couple at the corner. Maybe in their later 70’s. They caught my eye because as soon as the light changed, he grabbed for her hand and they walked across the street. When they got to the corner, he helped her up and they kept walking – hand in hand. It was beautiful. I (of course) got tears in my eyes and a big smile.
Although it seems almost extinct, holding hands really is a timeless display of affection – an outward expression of love, protection and commitment. We, of course, know what this feels like with our children. Holding those cute chubby, sweaty hands. (sigh again) But, eventually, they don’t want to hold our hands. I really miss those days…
When I was growing up, my grandparents held hands or they would lock their arms together. It was incredibly sweet. Why don’t we see that as much any more? Don’t you see more people on their cellphone than holding hands? Maybe we’re essentially trading that feeling for the comfort of our electronic device.
I like to squeeze hands. It’s my silent message which says, “I love you.” To my kids, holding hands is the least nauseating public display of affection.
I read an excerpt from a study published in the journal of Psychological Science on this topic. Sixteen couples who were rated happily married were studied. The wives were put inside an MRI machine and told they were to receive mild electric shocks to an ankle. Brain images showed that the regions of the women’s brains, which were activated in anticipation of pain and associated with negative emotions, decreased when their husbands reached into the machine to hold their hand. Isn’t that wonderful? I’m sure the same would be true for any special person.
I know we’re all busy. And, we’re not really like those characters strolling through a park in a Georges Seurat painting. But we do have time. So, when you’re out with your partner or your kid – grab hold of their hand (even for a momentary squeeze) as you walk, at dinner (or, if me – with my kids), at the grocery store! Holding hands will not save a relationship or solve all ills, but it’s a lovely start!
Have a great day!
theyearof50 