I love Bill Murray. And, as I may have mentioned, I love the movie Groundhog Day. First, I love the mindlessness of it – he’s so funny! But even more so, I love the part where he is forced to relive his life until he makes life changes and can move to a new day.
You know how this goes in real life too. You get up and are forced to keep doing the same thing over and over again. The same people, the same projects. In the movie, even when he tries to kill himself, he’s back the next morning in exactly the same place. He didn’t see his blind spot and had to live each day over until he realized it and made a change.
We all do this at times. We find ourselves in the same types of intimate relationships or friendships. For some reason, each partner doesn’t quite have what it takes to give them the love they truly desire. Every relationship ultimately ends up in the same stale place, missing something essential, or repeating an unhealthy pattern of distance, unavailability and neglect. Or we end up in the same types of jobs or communication styles with family and friends – the same conflict patterns, never really knowing, understanding or even seeing a way out.
The lesson of Groundhog Day is this:
Nothing will change in our lives until we change from the inside out.
It’s only when we stop blaming and feeling victimized by someone else and take responsibility for the fact that the relationship/friendship/job situation is partially our own creation – that we will see the shift.
So ask yourself: What needs to change inside you before you start getting a different result? What is the universe trying so hard to tell you, by putting you in the same cycle, that you just don’t understand?
Look, we all have dysfunction. But, either we bring this dysfunction from relationship to relationship (or life to life – if you believe that) or we don’t. At some point, the frustration, dissatisfaction and loneliness should result in us realizing that we need to make the change.
Most of us cannot see our own blind spots (I’ve got multiple and quite large blind spots!) and need guidance from our partners and loved ones, to point them out. When we are ready to learn, to listen and discover the truth about ourselves, then we need not repeat our mistakes over and over again.
So, ask yourself — is your blind spot causing you to stay in the same life patterns? If so, maybe it’s time to explore trying something different. How can it hurt??!!
Have a wonderful day! The birds are already chirping at 5:00 a.m!
theyearof50 