What’s happening to me? I think I might finally have a quantifiable reason for therapy (as if the other 100 reasons weren’t enough!).
Monday we had one of those big black flies moving back and forth through our kitchen. It was driving me crazy. My first swipe at it resulted in the screen falling off the window. The second, I spilled a glass of juice.
The third time I knew I got him, but all I could find was a wing left on the kitchen table. My heart broke. Where was he (notice I named him a “he”)? How was I left with one wing? Then I saw him. Flopping around on the table – wingless. I had to pick him up, smash him in a napkin and throw him away. I felt horrible.
Have I become too soft at 50? Am I going to be afraid to swat Minnesota’s state bird (mosquitos – for those of you not from MN) as it’s sucking my blood? Will I have issues with setting a trap for mice (praying that I don’t have any), rather than just letting them scurry around?
Honestly, this seems serious.
A few weeks ago, our kitchen was suddenly overrun with ants. The little ones. Marching all over the floor and picking up every little piece of food dropped by the kids (and there’s a lot!) This resulted in an ant tsunami where I literally took a wet paper towel and swiped up a few hundred of them. I wondered if the ants thought I was a cruel and powerful force of nature. I am, aren’t I?
I never think twice when I am paying the exterminator to get rid of those box elder bugs or the bees (actually, I did bee spraying last night too!).
I’m feeling a little violent with all the killing. In fact, I hate to admit this but last year I had a huge ant hill in my backyard. So, I did the only thing a civilized woman could do — I poured a large bucket of boiling water into the ant holes and stood there. I almost felt like they were screaming to me.
All of a sudden I’m worrying about the karmic effect on my life for killing these creatures. But fair is fair, if you’re going to invade my territory. Thank goodness I’m a vegetarian!
Have a fantastic day!
theyearof50 