I don’t like credit cards. I have two. One is a Macy’s card. Recently, Macy’s sent me a new card. I have no idea why but it came with a “Welcome to Macy’s” note and a coupon or two.
The first time I tried to use it I was in a hurry. The sales person said that I needed to call the main credit card number in order to get authorization to use the card. What? Authorization for a card I’ve been using for years? I declined, used my other credit card and was on my way.
The second time I tried to use it I was with my daughter. We waited almost 20 minutes, through various phone calls with the “credit card authorization” people before I finally got frustrated, paid with cash and left.
The third time I tried to use it was yesterday. I was not in a hurry and was going to get to the bottom of this issue. I tell the sales person that once she swipes my card it will come up “Check Authorization. ” She swipes my card and up comes the message. I give her my driver’s license, I know the drill, she calls and hands me the phone.
The woman on the other end tells me how sorry she is that my shopping has been disrupted but she’s got a few questions for me in order to verify that I am really Jessica Roe. First question: “Where did I live in 1985?” Huh? I don’t even remember 1985 and there’s no freaking way I recall the street name. I was in college and moving around like crazy. She suggests a neighborhood that sounds remotely familiar but I tell her to move on to some other question.
Second question: “Do I know Bea Dulop?” I look around. Is this a joke? What the h#@%? I don’t know anyone named Bea except Aunt Bea on the Andy Griffith show. I say that, but she’s not entertained. I’m getting pissed.
Third question: “Where was I born.” Easy! I tell her a hospital. Nope. Wrong. She wants the city.
Final question: “How long was I married.” I’m stunned. I ask how she knows that I’m divorced. No answer. I ask her if she wants the date we started marriage therapy, the date he moved out, the first day I felt divorced or the date it was actually final. She tells me that’s enough, I’ve passed and can now use my card.
Is this some kind of new, bizarre process for shopping at Macy’s? I’m now afraid to use the card in case it’s flagged again and I have to answer a question like, “Where do you buy your underwear.” The answer’s probably “Macy’s.” I’m going to say Walgreen’s. That’ll get me passing with flying colors!
Have a great start to the week!
theyearof50 