I was at the health club and in the locker room was a woman with a baby that was 7 months old. He was wrapped in a big white towel as she’d just showered him up. I chatted with her for a minute and then headed out. As I left, I felt myself starting to cry (sob, really, but who is going to argue with a menopausal woman?).
Do you ever have those days where it just hits you so hard — where you wish you could press the pause button on time? Where you recall those moments when your child was just a baby, with those big cheeks and eyes that smiled at you when you said their name? I clearly had one of those moments yesterday.
Recently, I noticed some of the girls in my son’s grade (7th). I was blown away by how grown up they seemed. I’m sure people say that about my boys – almost 5’11” and still growing. In a blink of an eye, my daughter will be leaving for college. When did all this happen? Sometimes, when I really think about it – my heart starts breaking.
Yes, it was exhausting to be a single mom with three kids under 5, a million diapers, bottles, shoes, socks, laundry …. we all remember it. Wanting to go to sleep at 8 when they did but knowing there was so much laundry or work to do.
Yet, like most difficult periods, we forget about the hard parts and remember the great things. Actually, it almost feels like I’ve been under a magic spell – cast upon me when they were born so that the time from diapers to driving passed like a nanosecond.
Have you seen that commercial for Subaru with the Dad handing over the keys to his daughter while giving driving instructions? The camera pans to the daughter who looks like she’s 5. Then the camera resets and the daughter is really a beautiful sixteen year-old girl who replies (as they do), “DAD, I KNOW,” and drives off. When I see that commercial, I can only stare and know that feeling way deep down inside of me. That total love, excitement about their lives and worry about their safety.
So, through my tears yesterday, I remembered what my mom had told me about being a parent (yesterday was her 73rd birthday — I miss you mom!): that our job as parents is to help guide our kids to become independent, successful, happy adults and then to let go.
Yesterday, as watched my kids at the table, talking with one another, I was overcome with joy and sense of appreciation that literally filled my whole being. Life is taking us all down diverse paths, yet we will always be a family. I marveled at how fast these treasures I’ve been given have grown up and how lucky I really have been to have these experiences with them.
Treasure your kids today (unless they are crabby … then try tomorrow! (smile))
theyearof50 