Well friends, there are a few things that come to MY mind when I say “faking it” and the first is the big O (no, not Oprah). And that would be an interesting topic if some kids weren’t reading this blog (sorry kids!). We 50+ women (oh, and I suppose men too) LOVE this topic … but, I digress.
This is (kind of) about the other faking it … the things that people fake in their lives. Here’s my non-exhaustive list of them:
- claiming you know something that you really don’t know anything about (in my profession … I see it all the time!);
- how much money you have (or don’t have);
- being nice to someone you don’t really like;
- whether you feel confident;
- your weight;
- giving an honest opinion because it will hurt the other person’s feelings;
- your resume:
- interest in sex with your spouse (again, sorry kids);
- your age (hmm, I might go for this!);
- a tan;
- REAL teeth color;
- plastic surgery.
Some of this may shift to the lying category, rather than the faking it category … that, I get. I am talking about the former, not the latter.
There are situations that warrant faking. I think it is ok to fake how you feel at certain times because it is easier to fake being happy and it feels better for other people. Plus, I actually believe that faking it can make it a reality, not for O’s (I know you kids know what I am talking about but I just will not spell it out here!), but for many other things. In other words, pretending you are happy may ultimately make you happy.
Of course, I am not suggesting that you don’t talk with those close to you about important issues in your life. I am just saying that we control our emotions and all those Yahoo-referenced studies do say that being happy boosts the immune system, lowers blood pressure and reduces stress!
Sometimes we fake things to mask insecurities and to feel better about ourselves. We’re worried about how others might view us so we just pretend we know things or understand stuff. This is true for motherhood. We know almost nothing when we start. And, we think that our children are a complete reflection of ourselves. So, we try not to “fail.” We want our kids to be perfect and our parenting to be the same (what is the perfect parent and can you tell me how to fake it??). Anyway, we moms all know the utter relief we feel when we see someone else’s kid do the same thing ours has done and we realize that we do not have to fake our kids “perfection!”
Some things can’t be faked, like love, commitment, passion and your moral compass. You also can’t fake compassion – which in my mind is the most important trait of all. Don’t you agree?
I’m definitely not faking it when I tell you to have a great day … I hope you have one today!
theyearof50 