Busy Mom. Sound redundant? Recently a friend said that I do too much. “You don’t have time to smell the roses and you don’t take time for yourself?” There are roses to be smelled? Time for myself? Maybe he’s right, but as he was talking my thoughts went to how my being busy might be affecting my children.
Busy moms balance the world on their shoulders while juggling children, jobs (paid and volunteer), homes, significant others, health, family … Yet, we are also supposed to take care of ourselves physically and mentally AND do it in a way that it doesn’t interfere with the 10,000 other things we are supposed to be doing.
Many busy moms struggle to find the balance between being a “super mom” and nurturing themselves. The trick is to be happy with being a “good” mother. Good mothers accept that they make mistakes and can’t deliver 100% to everyone. They understand that they are doing the best they can with what they have on that particular day.
I am just starting a book called “Unglued.” I am enjoying the part of the book about accepting who we are and finding ways to balance our lives and our emotions (FYI – it has a religious base – which is not my focus but may be yours).
Who hasn’t come “unglued” with their kids? It happened to me this weekend – at a time when I was trying to do 10 things at once (that’s when it always happens). Afterwards, I went to my son and apologized. He immediately apologized for his actions and then told me he loved me. How lucky am I?
I accept – no, I embrace being busy. However, as the mother of teens, I know they are at a critical age, looking for guidance and in need of some limits. So, I’ve tried to make an effort to ensure that I stay connected with my kids even with my (our) busy life:
1. Although my kids are eating two dinners each evening (well, the boys anyway) and they are in sports, I make a point of having at least three nights were I get everyone to the table. It may just be for a late night snack but its fun and phones, music and books are not allowed at this time.
2. Every week we have a night (usually Friday night) where we order Chinese food, watch a movie (or a game), eat popcorn and just chill together. Finding a movie that we all like does cause some bloodshed, but so far so good.
3. We laugh. We have a lot of funny things that happen in our house and we make a point of laughing together. In that same vein, we reminisce together as well. Which allows us to relive fun times from the past.
I’m not promising to smell all the roses just yet. However, I am going to work at being less than 100% and taking some time for myself. I hope you do too!
theyearof50 