We spent a long weekend in Lutsen and got back last night. On the ride up I noted that my kids had their music on and their earphones in. Ever notice how they don’t hear a word of what you are saying when those “things” are shoved in their ears? I get so frustrated. I’ve been trying to think of ways to deal with this and by the time we got back on the road home I had devised a plan.
Most teens spend a significant amount of time listening to music in their day-to-day lives. Music is also an outlet for teens to express and explore emotions that they are not comfortable talking about. Interestingly (or scarily), a 2011 study out of the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine found higher rates of depression in teens who listened to 4-5 hours of music a day versus those who read or did other activities (even watched TV). I devoured the study and it’s theories on the findings. Regardless, for those of you with teens (or upcoming teens), I suggest you check it out.
When I was growing up (back then we had handheld CD players), music defined certain times in my life. I recall my mom being quite in tune (no pun intended) with the music that I enjoyed. I think this was one of the things that my friends liked about her. She loved a great beat and the 60’s and 70’s music was still big — we enjoyed it together. So, how could I do the same with my kids when they have these buds shoved in their ears? How could I hear all the new stuff they were listening to and loved, yet allow them their space to choose and listen?
So, here was my plan: I asked the kids to each take turns playing, on the car system, their favorite song on their iPod. This turned out to be the best game we could play! We listened to quite a few songs and I learned that each one of my kids has eclectic but fantastic tastes in music. They learned that they had songs in common (so often they hate to admit they are related let alone have something in common!) and that liked songs that their siblings had but they didn’t.
This game was the culmination of a great family bonding weekend. We skied together. Ate together. Enjoyed the beauty of our surroundings together. And jammed together! There is nothing better.
Enjoy your family today — as tough as it can be sometimes, they are your family.
theyearof50 